ALBUM DELAYED BY SMALL ARSE

Yes, I know, some time ago I claimed this new album was nearly done, so where on earth is it? Well, the holdup is my arse, or rather lack of it. I realised a little while back that in the modern pop world, as exemplified by high priestess of pop Nicki Minaj, a pumped up rear end is a necessity. Not naturally blessed with much of an arse to speak off (it’s functional, but nothing more), over the last few months I’ve been building it up with regular injections of stuff. But progress has been slow and messy. Just to give you an idea of what I have achieved so far, here is the before and after:

 

Unfortunately, my ‘people’ will only let me release something once I achieve my target of this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At which point, as Diplo has so eloquently pointed out, I will be able to “express myself” fully.

As you can see, I’ve some way to go. But I think you will also agree, good progress is being made. So there you go, that’s why the album is delayed. Hope that clears the matter up for you.

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